Kismet With A Fluffy Ending

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white towel woman

Watashi wa anata ni fusawashīi.

This is Japanese for “I am made for you.” Methinks there was once an ad that said so. Dope.

Hiya. My name’s Towel-Chan. Barcode: 272318.

I am a native Nihongo and I come from the MUJI factory. I knew Lina when she first came to our store at the Paragon in 2015.

She didn’t buy anything. She didn’t see me. I saw her.

“What the…” Lina mumbled and sneered when she saw the price of a linen dress at the store. Not within her budget. But I know her. She’s a discerning consumer; even winning at the Pandemmys isn’t as tempting as that lovely dress.

To her, a linen dress caresses the skin just like duckling fur is to a Polo Ralph Lauren cashmere sweater. A Miu Miu Lambskin Wallet or a Superdry tee is of the softness quotient that of my legit hair.

She drinks fabric espresso…

It’s official. I had to do something. I didn’t have a plan tho.

Baka! (Stupid!)

To make things worse, some of our stores closed down for good in the Land of Liberty due to COVID-19.

How am I gonna channel my Marie Kondo-ish magic on her? You see, I spark joy.

“Chan” is a Japanese term of endearment; just like how a kindred homie gets drawn to people who truly care for their belongings.

Damn, wotif we never meet? She needs protection for bath rituals innit?

Ick. I got shipped back to the warehouse and that was it. Bummer.

Well…

Plot twist.

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Fast forward to 2020 and she saw the 9.9 Shopee Sale. My persuasive skills had to be my biggest flex. She was looking for the perfect towel, for her current non-absorbent ones scratched her skin. I was the first thing she searched for on her browser and I had good reviews. A customer even called me the fluffer nutter.

Yeah. Imma Medium Thick selling for about 30 bucks (SGD). A reasonable price point for refined quality. Fastest fingers first.

Add to Cart.

Buy.

I arrived via home delivery two weeks later. She took her shower and relished organic cotton on her baby skin.

Dayum! She squealed when she noticed that I was soaking up excess water effortlessly. I was and still am her BFF. She made sure I stayed pristine, preventing any stains on me because I’m white right. Defo not supremacist white. Just wipe-da-ass kinda white.

Practical and minimalist.

She hugged me and purred “Why didn’t I get that memo about you earlier? I’m shook. Mi casa es su casa.”

Well, it’s nice to be home…


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